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Confessions of a Study Diva

Pink Tiara

As I read last week’s article Unleashing the STUVAC Mess Monster about how fashion, food and household cleanliness can sometimes hit a new low around exam times, I found myself nodding along. If the author had said that she hadn’t showered once during STUVAC, I think I would have excused this as exam focus.

And then I remembered the other side of studying… the princess side. I am a princess studier, and like Beyoncé before a show, I have DEMANDS. These are my confessions…

Before the studying can start, everything has to be spotless and organised: book case in order, wardrobe color coded and folded, floor vacuumed, bed made, and so on, but the desk is where the real crazy starts.

Color-coding? Too messy. Everything must be white. Photos? Black and white. Calendar? Grey and white. Pens? Black yes, but nice big heavy silver metal ones to train my hand muscles. Pencil case? Not on my watch. All these measures might be the difference between and credit and a distinction, you see. During my HSC year, my cousin even helped me to paint my room an off white.

It gets worse. Last year a mystery stain appeared on my desk. I cried for two days as I tried everything under the sun to remove it. How could I pass an exam if I couldn’t even look after a desk?!

A good study session also needs flowers. The aroma calms me, the greenery invigorates me, and while JLo reportedly demands white flowers backstage, my only requirement is that they have an aroma.

During exam season I also need to work out at least four times a week, when I start to physically shake with panic and feel like the inner crazy might creep out somewhere inappropriate. This would be healthy if I didn’t hurt myself in the process. Last semester I fractured my tibia, but wouldn’t get it x-rayed until I’d finished my thesis. This year, having been banned from yoga due to afore mentioned tibia injury, I sprained my wrists doing an upper body workout at the gym.

At least during STUVAC my diet improves astronomically. I go from eggs benedict and coffee at 4am to brown rice sushi and green tea. No junk food is allowed unless I’ve just finished an exam (cue binge).

I don’t advocate painting your room or working through fractured tibias in the name of study, but exam stress makes law students do funny things. Surely I can’t be alone.

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